英语笑话小短文带翻译

　　1、Good Boy

　　Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. “What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?”

　　“I gave it to a poor old woman,” he answered.

　　“You’re a good boy,” said the mother proudly. “Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?”

　　“She is the one who sells the candy.”

　　好孩子

　　小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

　　“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”

　　“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”

　　“她是个卖糖果的。”

　　2、Nest and Hair

　　My sister, a primary school teacher, was informed by one of her pupils that a bird had built its nest in the tree outside the classroom.

　　“What kind of bird?” my sister asked.

　　“I didn’t see the bird, ma’ am, only the nest,” replied the child.

　　“Then, can you give us a description of the nest?” my sister encouraged her .

　　“Well, ma’am, it just resembles your hair. ”

　　Notes:

　　(1) inform v.告诉

　　(2) nest n.窝;巢

　　(3) description n.描述

　　(4) encourage v.鼓励

　　(5) resemble v. 相似;类似

　　鸟窝与头发

　　我姐姐是一位小学老师。一次一个学生告诉她说一只鸟儿在教室外 的树上垒了个窝。

　　“是什么鸟呢?”我姐姐问她。

　　“我没看到鸟儿，老师，只看到鸟窝。”那孩子回答说。

　　“那么，你能给我们描述一下这个鸟巢吗?”我姐姐鼓励她道。

　　“哦，老师，就像你的头发一样。”

　　3、A Woman Who Fell

　　It was rush hour and I was dashing to a train in New York City’s Grand Central Terminal – As I neared the gate, a plump, middle-aged woman sprinted up from behind, lost her footing on the smooth marble floor and slid onto her back. Her momentum carried her close to my shoes. Before I could help her, however, she had scrambled up. Gaining her composure, she winked at me and said, “Do you always have beautiful women failing at your feet?”

　　摔倒的女人

　　上下班高峰期，我匆匆奔向纽约豪华中心站去赶一趟火车。接近门口，一位肥胖的中年妇女从后面冲过来，没想到在平滑的大理石地面上失了脚，仰面滑倒了。她的惯性使她接近了我的`脚。我正准备扶她，她却自己爬了起来。她镇定了一下，对我挤了一下眉，说道：“总是有漂亮女人拜倒在你脚下吗?”

　　4、The mean man’s party.

　　The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, “Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot.”

　　“Why use my elbow and foot?”

　　“Well, gosh,” was the reply, “You’re not coming empty-hangded, are you?”

　　吝啬鬼请客

　　一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，找中间那个门，然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后，再用你的脚把门推开。”

　　“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”

　　“你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪，你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。

　　5、Cat and Mice

　　Mrs Brown went to visit one of her friend and carried a small box with holes punched in the top.

　　" What's in your box?" asked the friend.

　　"A cat," answered Mrs Brown. "You see I've been dreaming about mice at night and I'm so scared! This cat is to catch them."

　　"But the mice are only imaginary," said the friend.

　　"So is the cat," whispered Mrs Brown.

　　猫和老鼠

　　布朗夫人去拜访一位朋友，她拿着一个顶部扎满了小眼儿的盒子。“盒子里装的是什么?”朋友问道。“一只小猫，”布朗夫人回答说，“你知道我晚上睡觉总梦见老鼠，我非常害怕。这只猫可以抓住那些老鼠。”“可老鼠都是假想的呀。”朋友说。“小猫也是假想的。”布朗夫人小声说道。